In my last post we looked at the “What’s Bugging Me Now” technique that helps clear away mind clutter so you can enjoy a more positive outlook. In this post I want to share one more powerful technique for helping you to be at your best. It’s called…

The Forgive and Forget Technique

You’d be amazed at how many people (people I’ve interviewed over the years) who have a chip on their shoulder. Whenever they start talking about their previous employer, previous manager, or previous people they’ve worked with, you can see it in their face and in their body language, they get all tensed up. No matter how they try to pretty it up with their words, it’s easy to sense they have a negative mindset towards others.

So let me ask you this… if you were a hiring manager, would you rather hire a person who is upbeat, positive, kind and generous, who genuinely likes other people, or someone you sense has some negative emotional baggage? Most hiring managers will hire the positive upbeat person and they will stay far away from a person they sense has negative baggage.

So this is where the “forgive and forget technique” comes in. Here’s what you do…

Grab a notepad and a pen or pencil. Write-down a list of everyone you have negative feelings towards, especially if they have to do with previous work places. Then, next to each person’s name right down why you think they did some of the mean or stupid things they did. It could be that they were abused when they were young, they may be going through a divorce, they may not have been blessed with a good personality, or a working brain (just kidding on the last part), but write down whatever you think it is that would cause them to act in those offensive ways.

Next, try to think of any time you personally have been mean, thoughtless, un-thinking, or have done anything stupid. This should bring you closer to their level so you can see that we are all human and that we all have issues from time to time. Of course some people have more issues than others, but the point is, none of us is perfect.

Now try to imagine the offending person when they were a small child. What must’ve happened to that beautiful, innocent little child that caused them to grow up to be such a mean butt-head? Probably something not very good, right?

Finally, try to feel sorry for them at least a little bit. If you have some type of faith where you pray, then pray for them to become a better person. If not, just decide to send them love in the form of positive feelings and kind thoughts. Feel sorry for them, send them love, and make a decision right now to forgive any offense they’ve committed. Don’t hope for justice to be served, or for them to be paid back for what they’ve done. Hey you don’t want to be paid back for your mistakes either, do you? Just decide once and for all to forgive and forget. Remember the only person your negative thoughts and feelings will harm, is you. So get rid of them (the negative thoughts and feelings that is) not the offending person.

Now if you really want to supercharge your mindset, you can do the same Forgive and Forget Technique on your own self! You can do this to forgive yourself from any and all past wrongs you’ve done!

Hey we’re all human and we all make mistakes! Just don’t hold your past against yourself. The past is gone. You have each day going forward to strive toward being your absolute best. Forgive yourself of the past and focus on the good things you desire to do going forward. Next time you make a mistake, forgive yourself quickly and focus on doing better as you move forward!

After you complete this exercise, take the paper, rip it up and throw it away. You can even bury it in the ground, but just decide to let go of all negative thoughts towards others.

Believe me, you’ll be so glad you did this exercise. You’ll feel so much better, and you’ll take less negative energy with you everywhere you go. This exercise will ultimately help you when you go to an interview for a job, just because you’ll be emitting more positive, generous vibrations.

“Whether you believe you can do a thing or you believe you can not, you are right.” Henry Ford

Discouraging, scary, frustrating…for most people, job searching is all this and more! But you don’t need me to tell you that, you already know!

You need a job…and the sooner the better! Right!

So, if you want that job fast, you need to start with the frame of mind that will help you get it fast.

In my next few posts, I will give you several simple techniques for getting your head to the top of the job search game.

Here’s the deal, every hiring manager wants to interview and hire a person with a great attitude and a positive mindset. In fact I don’t know of any hiring manager who enjoys interviewing a person who is negative, has mental or emotional baggage, a chip on their shoulder, or who is so reserved you can’t tell if they have a bad or a good attitude! Hiring managers are simply far more inclined to hire up beat, positive, generous, good natured people.

Whether you think you need to improve your mindset or not, please do it! You’ll be surprised at what it does for you!

Trust me on this. When you do these quick little winning-mindset builders, your whole outlook on life improves and you’ll magically find that your job search efforts a greatly improved!

When you practice these techniques before an interview, believe me, you’ll notice how much better your interviews work out!

Ok, if you’re ready to start getting your mind into job winning mode?  Then start with the following exercise and experience some powerful mojo!

Technique #1 – The What’s Bugging Me Now Technique:

Now most people who are challenged with searching for a job have at least some negative thoughts floating around in their head.  Fear, doubt, anger, low self-esteem, resentment…you know that sort of thing.  Even a little negative thought residue is bad for you, and believe it or not other people can sense it.

This “What’s bugging me now” technique and all the other techniques I will be sharing with you in future posts, will totally do away with an unproductive mindset.  Even if you don’t think you have a problem, I suggest you go through this exercise anyway because it will boost your mindset so much that you’ll automatically become more charismatic and likable.  And believe me that will come in handy in your next interview.

Okay here’s what you do. On a piece of paper make three columns, like the example below.  In column number one you’ll write down everything that’s bothering you, big or small. In column number two you’ll write down why it bothers you. And, in column number three you’ll write down anything positive that you can do to deal with it, Or anything you can do to help you accept it if there’s nothing you can do about it.

Now go ahead and make this list and write out every single thing you can think of that’s been bothering you (big or small).  This automatically helps you get all your hidden negative thoughts and feelings out of your body, out of your mind, and out onto a piece of paper where you can see it for what it really is. It’s really just “crap thinking” that doesn’t do you any good. Negative thinking and worry wont change anything, no matter how hard you think about it! This exercise helps you deal with things in a very positive way.

Before you start this exercise take notice of how you feel inside.  Just take a quick mental note of it and remember what you feel like now. Then, after you’ve done this exercise take note of how you feel inside again. Notice what an incredible feeling of freedom and relief you have.  Notice how much better you feel inside.  This is pretty cool, now go ahead and try it for yourself.

What’s Bugging Me Now Technique!

Look for my next tip in the next few days!

Suppose you could go inside the mind of a hiring manager. The place where you could actually understand their idea of the ideal candidate. The place where you could find out exactly what they’re looking for. What would it be like if you knew all the little secrets of how their hiring decisions are made? Do you think this information could give you an advantage over other job candidates?

I’ve recently met several people who have been out of work for a long period of time. One person for over nine months and the other person has been unemployed for over a year and a half. What I found interesting is that both of these individuals seem to have good marketable skills, and even pleasant personalities. But when I began to dig into how they approach their job searches, I could understand why they were having so much trouble finding a job.

It made me think of several times in my life when I had to find a job. Times when the economy wasn’t in very good shape, and there was a lot of competition for jobs. Oddly enough, during those times I lacked formal education and training, I even lacked experience. And yet I never had to go much beyond 30 days to find a job. And not just find a job, find a better job than the last one I had. So how was I able to do that?

I’ve also spent some time thinking about how I hire people. Because today I am a hiring manager. Now the fact is I was in ninth grade dropout till I was 27 years old, and I still don’t have a college degree of any kind, but I now hire and manage people who have master’s degrees! I read a lot of resumes and I know which ones get my attention. I interview a lot of candidates and I know why most people fail, and why the very few succeed in winning a job offer.

In thinking about this whole job search issue, I’ve identified the five basic differentiators between those who succeed easily in finding a new job, and those who don’t. Here they are

# 1. Mindset: There is definitely a huge difference between the mindset of those who win jobs easily, and those who struggle to find a job. Let me ask you a question. Who do you think is more successful in life, an optimist or a pessimist? If you were going in for surgery, would you prefer your surgeon be an optimist or pessimist? And if you were a hiring manager would you rather hire an up beat, well-balanced, positive focused person, or someone who’s down in the dumps and bummed out because they can’t find a job? Having the right mindset makes a big difference when you’re looking for a job. I’ll address this in more detail in the next article I post.

# 2. Job Search Strategy: There seems to be three basic job search strategies I can easily identify. The first one is no strategy, followed closely by the ineffective job search strategy. Judging by the conversations I’ve had with job searchers, I’d have to guess that about 95% of jobseekers fall into one of these first two categories. But when I examine my own experience with finding jobs, and I talk to people who are very successful at landing jobs quickly, I discover that we do many of the same things. And these specific methods of job searching make up the third category which is a super effective job search strategy. An effective job search strategy involves far more than just posting your resume all over the place, or answering a few job posting ads. I will go into this in deeper detail in a future post.

# 3. Resumes and Cover Letters: Employers and hiring managers are bombarded with so many resumes and cover letters that it’s impossible to go through them all. Unfortunately for job seekers, about 95% of these look, feel, and sound very similar. So most of these get thrown out without even a shot. Another 2% try to be creative but come off the goofy, also thrown out. Finally about 3% of resumes get through to a hiring manager. These are written in a specific way that are easy to read, contain all the information a hiring manager loves to hear, and look professional, and unique. These candidates get interviews.

# 4. Interviewing Skills: Here’s where people either kill their chances of getting a job, or where they win a job offer. It’s simply amazing that so few people ever master the art of interviewing. Part of the problem is that a lot of people don’t understand what a hiring manager is really looking for. They assume it has to do with their educational level, their skill level, or their job experience, but these are not the most important things to a hiring manager! I can tell you from my own experience that I hire highly educated, highly skilled, highly qualified individuals, and the last thing I’m concerned about is where their college degree came from, or if they even have one! I want to know a few simple things like… Can they do the job? Will they be good at it? Will they get along with me, our team, our customers? Will they be a pain in the butt to manage or easy to manage?  That’s the short list!  Most managers care far more about these, and a few other things, than they do about education or experience. Believe me, I’ve hired highly educated people with incredible experience who’ve turned out to be the absolute worst employees’ ever!  Candidates who know what to communicate and how to communicate to a hiring manager, will be considered for the job.

# 5. Interpersonal or People Skills: This one is huge! Hiring managers are people. People hire people they like, people they feel comfortable with. The job candidate who has mastered a few basic people skills can win over a hiring manager and increase their odds of getting the job. On the other hand, a highly educated, qualified, skilled up person, who lacks people skills, will always have a tough time winning a job offer.

In upcoming posts I will break these points out in more detail and give you valuable tips that will help you land a job anytime you want or need one!